Out to Lunch €“ Breastfeeding in Public

Repeat after me: Breastfeeding isn’t sexy. Breastfeeding isn’t rude. Breastfeeders aren’t unashamed exhibitionists just wanting to whip out their breasts on national telly to create a frenzy.

As a breastfeeding mum, I’m concerned at the current debate about breastfeeding in public. Flaunt your cleavage in a push-up bra and low-cut top, sunbathe topless, or use your breasts to sell something, and no one blinks an eye. Use your breasts for their natural function, and risk criticism, disbelief, and disapproval.

Pregnancy and parenting websites around Australia have recently highlighted the fact that breastfeeding women are regularly asked to move on, or chided for feeding their babies and toddlers in public – even though it’s our right to do so.

Recently, The Panel hostess Kate Langbroek nursed her six-week-old baby on TV – without exposing her breasts - and reignited the controversy. Excuse me if I missed something, but everyone else on the talk show seemed to have a cup of something to drink in front of them during the show. Why shouldn’t Kate’s beautiful little boy do the same?

One of the biggest criticisms seems to be that Kate was feeding her baby on a live TV show. ;And sure, maybe that’s not the most discreet place to breastfeed, but from where I was sitting, the baby didn’t seem to mind.

The critics of women like Kate and much-maligned politician Kirstie Marshall – who was ejected from parliament after breastfeeding her baby earlier this year - seem to feel that breastfeeding mums should do so at home, or at least away far away from the public sight. But when I last checked, babies don’t care where they are when they decide they are hungry, and need to be fed Right Now.

And anyway, if we all waited to feed our babies somewhere discreet, the world would be full of crying babies and stressed out mums with big wet spots where their breasts are.
You can’t always find a parenting room right at the minute you need it. Or you might have a toddler, a physical condition, or work commitments, which mean you can’t trawl around searching for somewhere ‘discreet’ or wait until you get home to feed your crying child – even if you want to. Besides, when there are parenting rooms, some of them, even in so-called luxury establishments, consist of one chair in a smelly, dirty rest room. Call me fussy, but I don’t eat my lunch in toilets, and I don’t expect my baby to, either.

The thing is, appearing on The Panel is Kate Langbroek’s job. If taking her baby along for her first day back at work meant she came back earlier than she might have otherwise, her employer should be applauded for making the transition easier.
Are critics suggesting she shouldn’t be back at work? It’s time to get real. Many breastfeeding mums are the family’s sole or major wage earners these days. If they can do that, while taking care of their baby’s needs, what’s the problem? We all know multi-tasking Mums can do dozens of things at once.

Increasingly, progressive employers like Queensland company Tamawood Homes, are making allowances for breastfeeding mums, knowing they’re helping valued employees come back to work earlier than they may have if they’d had to wean their baby first. ;The company makes an office available so that nursing mums can feed their babies on demand, and still fulfil their work obligations.

Yet other critics complain that breastfeeding is a natural bodily function, and that we don’t urinate or defecate in public, so we shouldn’t nurse our babies either. I don’t know about you, but I don’t know anyone who drinks wee or eats poo – well, except my 2-½ year-old when he finds doggie-do in the garden, but that doesn’t count!

I’m biased, I admit. I’m a breastfeeding mum too, and regularly take my eight-month-old baby Harmonie to work with me, as I did with my toddler son Chase. For the first few months of Harmonie’s life, she wouldn’t drink a bottle (of my expressed milk) from anyone, and even now, there are times – like when she is teething or sick – that only the breast will do.

I’m lucky that I have a self-employed husband, and an au pair, to accompany me to work-related commitments. I personally, have never had a negative reaction when I’ve fed my baby at work, sometimes in the middle of interviews; once, notably, at Dreamworld’s Big Brother house as a Bengal tiger walked by. Indeed, on many occasions, when I’ve made the excuse that I can’t attend a particular event because I’m a nursing Mum, I’ve been invited to bring her along.

But privately, the reactions are mixed. Most people are lovely, but I have to admit there have been more criticisms than I can count - women who have asked me not to do it in front of their husbands (even though no one could possibly see anything but my baby’s head unless they are really staring), leering men, and well-meaning but ill-informed people who insisted my toddler son was “too old” for that (he gave up on his own just before his second birthday).

Call me an exhibitionist, but I fail to see how a woman breastfeeding her child on television could be offensive, when footage of a pair of breasts cleaning a window on the same show earlier that night did not attract a murmur. The problem seems to be that many people sexualise breastfeeding – when any nursing mum knows that painful nipples, leaking milk, and bulky maternity bras are anything but sexy!
And as for those who claim the whole thing was staged? Six-week-old demand-fed babies can’t tell the time. Sometimes they’ll go for hours without a feed, sometimes they’ll want a top-up 20 minutes later. The chances are they’ll decide they are hungry at the worst possible moment – as you’re leaving the house, in the middle of a doctor’s examination, or yes, even on national television.

I, for one, would like to applaud Kate for showing breastfeeding like it is – a perfectly natural and normal part of being a Mum.

And any people who think otherwise are the real boobs.